Stop Taking the Blame from Others and Affirm Your Self-Worth

And Finally...

By now, you’ve probably realized the importance of asking yourself, *“Is this mine to carry?” Then comes the hard part—dropping those emotional “bags” on the curb and walking freely into the life you’re meant to live.

The how of this process can feel a bit mysterious, but it doesn’t have to be.

When it comes to emotional healing, I always turn to essential oils first. Why? Because they’re one of the many tools God gave us to help reprogram the miswritten information in our brains. Sometimes, I also use a frequency tool called Inner Voice to pinpoint emotions more precisely, but oils are my go-to. If you’re still reading this, chances are you already know you tend to take on blame that isn’t yours. Good—we’ve established that. Now it’s time to do two key things to step into total freedom.

1. Decide

This is your “Twisted Sister” moment: *You’re not gonna take it anymore.* This doesn’t mean you’re going to stage a dramatic confrontation or tell everyone around you to take a hike. It’s a quiet, mental decision. Draw your line in the sand. Decide, once and for all, that you’re done carrying blame that doesn’t belong to you.

2. Declare

Now that you’ve made your decision, it’s time to declare it. Not to the people around you, but to yourself. Create a powerful affirmation—something you can say out loud at least twice a day for about 10 minutes. Think of affirmations as weightlifting for your brain. The more you speak these truths with conviction, the more your brain will adapt and align with them.

At first, your mind might push back—and that’s a *good* thing! When your mind resists, don’t judge yourself or the thought. Instead, see it as an opportunity to understand what’s holding you back. Acknowledge it, thank your mind for revealing the belief, and then repeat your affirmation. If you’re ready to dig deeper, explore the root of that resistance. One technique I love is the Aroma Freedom Technique, which uses essential oils and guided steps to clear out negative thought patterns or memories and replace them with something positive and empowering. It’s simple, yet incredibly effective.

Breaking Free From Blame

Letting go of blame-taking is a lot like leaving a gang. Both require stepping away from unhealthy, harmful dynamics, often facing resistance from those who want to keep you in the old patterns. People who are used to dumping blame on you might feel rejected, lash out, or try to guilt you into going back to your old role.

It takes courage, self-worth, and often the support of people who value your growth to truly break free. But the journey is worth it.

Healing from blame-taking isn’t something you have to do alone. This is the time to seek out relationships with people who see your worth and cherish the gift you bring to the world. They’re out there, I promise—they’ve just been crowded out by those who don’t respect your boundaries. When you step away from the blame-givers, you make space for life-giving relationships to enter.

Remember, like energy attracts like energy. As you step into your freedom, you’ll naturally attract others who honor and uplift you.

Freedom is yours. All you need to do is decide, declare, and step into the life you were meant to live.