The Beauty of Choosing a Word—One Month at a Time

Every New Year, thousands—perhaps millions—across the globe prayerfully consider a single word to define their year ahead. It’s a meaningful practice, a touchstone for intention-setting, and a guiding light for the journey ahead. I’ve engaged in this tradition many times over the years, and for a while, it served me well.

Until it didn’t.

The last time I chose a word for the year, it was the year my husband passed. That word, in hindsight, was my final one. Not to be overly dramatic, but something about the process lost its luster for me. Life had changed in such an irreparable way that a single word felt insufficient to encapsulate the enormity of my grief and the day-to-day survival that followed. My new word became simply “tryna.” As in, I was just tryna get through another day with some semblance of grace. Just tryna keep my head above water. Just tryna navigate this new, unwanted version of my life.

Over time, without even meaning to, I fell into the habit of choosing a word for the month instead. It wasn’t a conscious decision at first—it just happened organically. As each new month rolled in, bringing fresh challenges, new bills, parenting responsibilities, and the ever-evolving demands of running a business, I found myself asking, What do I need to focus on this month? Sometimes, the answer was trust. Other times, it was resilience. Some months demanded more patience than joy, more perseverance than gratitude.

And so, I embraced this shift. A new month became a fresh start. After Mark passed, each month represented a choice: to lean into faith or to curl up in an emotional heap and pray for mercy.

Low key, grief is ugly. It doesn’t follow a neat timeline or a tidy resolution. It morphs, it lingers, it surprises you when you think you’ve finally gained solid footing. And so, committing to one word for 365 days? That didn’t feel realistic. Instead, I let the changing seasons, the energy of each month, and the rhythms of my own healing dictate the word I needed most.

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Each month carries a different vibration and energy. Some months, I go with the grain, choosing words like joy and gratitude during November or generosity in December. Other times, my soul whispers that I need something else—something like endurance, courage, or stillness.

It be like that sometimes.

Word of the Year Might Not Work for Everyone

In a world where trends shift by the second and TikTok challenges dictate our cultural pulse, the idea of committing to a single word for an entire year feels a little lofty. And let’s be real—how many of us have chosen a word with the best intentions, only to find by March (or let’s be honest, February) that we’ve completely lost sight of it?

It’s like setting a New Year’s resolution to earn a million dollars or lose a hundred pounds, only to realize a few weeks in that such sweeping changes require massive lifestyle adjustments. The same goes for a word of the year—it requires a level of commitment that, for some, might not align with the season of life they’re in.

As I’ve coached women over the years, I’ve noticed a pattern: the desire to do all the things, to live well, and to meet the expectations of the world around them. But here’s the truth—freedom isn’t found in chasing someone else’s standard. Freedom is found in running your race at your pace, in your season of life.

A Word for This Season

Some of you are in a season of healing, where each month might call for a word like Grace, Hope, or Surrender. Others have emerged from recovery and are stepping into a new chapter. But looking down the barrel of 365 days of commitment to a single word? That might feel impossible. And that’s okay.

Instead, consider taking it one month at a time. Start with something gentle—perhaps Rest. Or Strength. Or Flow. Just as the moon cycles through its phases and the seasons shift with their own wisdom, we, too, can honor the natural ebb and flow of life. Creation understands this rhythm—the stars, the tides, the animals. Maybe it’s time we do, too.

A Simple Practice to Begin

As this new month approaches, I invite you to pause. On the last day of the month, take a quiet moment for yourself. Reflect on the past 30 days and gently look ahead.

Ask yourself: What word would serve me best in this next season?

Let the answer come naturally—without pressure, without expectation.

And if you need a little ritual to help set the tone, might I suggest this: Draw a warm Epsom salt bath, add 20 drops of Release essential oil, and let yourself simply be. As the steam rises and the weight of the month melts away, allow yourself to listen. Your word will find you.

A new month is upon us. What will you choose?